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What if heterosexuality wasn’t innate, but enforced and expected?
Can sexuality change?
Can any woman be a lesbian?
Bringing together women across cultures and generations – from lifelong lesbians exploring their experiences through a lesbian feminist lens, to women consciously leaving heterosexuality behind to embrace lesbianism – I Wish I Was a Lesbian addresses those questions and more. Once understood as the cornerstone of patriarchal control of women, any current political analysis of heterosexuality is now buried under an avalanche of essentialist ideas that serve to invisibilise its political nature and de-radicalise feminism. From autobiographical and theoretical essays to poetry and artworks, I Wish I Was a Lesbian defies taboo and silencing and reopens the conversation. It challenges the notion that heterosexuality is the natural and inevitable fate of most women.
There are many forces keeping women in heterosexual relationships. The latest is to accuse lesbians who have had previous relations with men of being ‘not real lesbians’, ‘pretenbians’ or ‘bisexuals’. But the idea that lesbians are ‘born that way’ is not based in either reality or science. There are no lesbian genes or lesbian brains. For women currently rejecting men and saying they wished they were lesbians but don’t know how to get there, this book offers a vital tool for political reflection and consciousness raising. It invites women everywhere to connect the personal with the political and to ask themselves the most radical question of all: “What is heterosexuality – and do I really want to be part of it?”
The feminist revolution made us the heroes of our own stories.
—Lynn AldersonWe are lesbians not because we cannot help it; we are lesbians because we want to be lesbians, despite all patriarchal obstacles. — Ananda Castaño
MAY 2026 | ISBN 9781922964311 | 302 pages
What if heterosexuality wasn’t innate, but enforced and expected?
Can sexuality change?
Can any woman be a lesbian?
Bringing together women across cultures and generations – from lifelong lesbians exploring their experiences through a lesbian feminist lens, to women consciously leaving heterosexuality behind to embrace lesbianism – I Wish I Was a Lesbian addresses those questions and more. Once understood as the cornerstone of patriarchal control of women, any current political analysis of heterosexuality is now buried under an avalanche of essentialist ideas that serve to invisibilise its political nature and de-radicalise feminism. From autobiographical and theoretical essays to poetry and artworks, I Wish I Was a Lesbian defies taboo and silencing and reopens the conversation. It challenges the notion that heterosexuality is the natural and inevitable fate of most women.
There are many forces keeping women in heterosexual relationships. The latest is to accuse lesbians who have had previous relations with men of being ‘not real lesbians’, ‘pretenbians’ or ‘bisexuals’. But the idea that lesbians are ‘born that way’ is not based in either reality or science. There are no lesbian genes or lesbian brains. For women currently rejecting men and saying they wished they were lesbians but don’t know how to get there, this book offers a vital tool for political reflection and consciousness raising. It invites women everywhere to connect the personal with the political and to ask themselves the most radical question of all: “What is heterosexuality – and do I really want to be part of it?”
The feminist revolution made us the heroes of our own stories.
—Lynn AldersonWe are lesbians not because we cannot help it; we are lesbians because we want to be lesbians, despite all patriarchal obstacles. — Ananda Castaño
MAY 2026 | ISBN 9781922964311 | 302 pages